10:26AM
Mood: Sleep Deprived lol
Little did i know that lessening my social media interactions (i.e. Twit, IG, Tumblr, etc) as well as limiting my mobile game playing (carpal tunnel flare up) would turn day one and the dawn of day two into a Trich/disassociation flare up. So yeah, I was up until 4 AM. I had been correcting my fanfiction collection (of which I have over 160k saved but many duplicates) and watching Randy Feltface clips on YT via one of his YT playlists but my hand found my hair via tweezers and I started yanking. So when my hand dropped the tweezers some hours later, I kind of slowly came out of the disassociation and shaved my head (only way I am able to fully combat my disorder and even then it's not fully) and finally slept. Didn't wake up until about 9:50 AM and feel a bit groggy from only 5 hours of sleep. There's always a sense of being slightly hung over after one of these episodes and it's disconcerting. As I've grown older and learned what to call things (thanks Tiktok I guess), I've been better able to express myself and what I go through. Even if just to myself.
Also, I find it interesting that without the usual algo's and tactics that social media en whole utilize to keep a person coming back to the platform, I am more inclined to spend time here on DW.
2:51 PM (14:51)
Mood: Okay
Interacted with some friends on Discord and beyond a heart on one of my comments, didn't receive anything more than that. I kind of prepared myself for this hiatus to increase my loneliness factor (hence posting to this journal to share my thoughts with ANYONE or just myself, I don't know) but without the constant noise of social media it feels loud. But that's okay. I posted about my goals yesterday but I really only wanted to take a break because I spend way too much of my time on social media. Also using this break to not play games on my phone is also good because of my carpal tunnel. It's already better but little steps.
I have so many projects that I want to work on but was always distracted by the socials, so that's also a reason, goal, whatever. Today I am still working on fixing the duplicate issue in Calibre as well as uploading the fanfic epubs to my gdrive.
Speaking of gdrive, I keep trying to brainstorm alternatives but they hold the market with size vs cost.
Mood: Chill
I need to find more people to follow on DW because my reading list is DEAD. Not that that is bad, especially considering my social media tendencies. To be honest, I miss LJ days a lot. When everyone was in one place. Losing LJ was one thing (I refuse to remain on LJ due to the current owner - my LJ is still there, just never updated) and old Twitter is the same thing. It just really sucks that I find a place and it's great for a while and then I lose it. UGH. Just remembering about it. Being nostalgic now that I'm using DW as a socmed crutch. I tried using Wordpress as a blog but nothing ever competed with LJ/DW. Maybe I'll import those posts here and close that one. I still have the archive, the poetry one, and one other.
Mood: Sleep Deprived lol
Little did i know that lessening my social media interactions (i.e. Twit, IG, Tumblr, etc) as well as limiting my mobile game playing (carpal tunnel flare up) would turn day one and the dawn of day two into a Trich/disassociation flare up. So yeah, I was up until 4 AM. I had been correcting my fanfiction collection (of which I have over 160k saved but many duplicates) and watching Randy Feltface clips on YT via one of his YT playlists but my hand found my hair via tweezers and I started yanking. So when my hand dropped the tweezers some hours later, I kind of slowly came out of the disassociation and shaved my head (only way I am able to fully combat my disorder and even then it's not fully) and finally slept. Didn't wake up until about 9:50 AM and feel a bit groggy from only 5 hours of sleep. There's always a sense of being slightly hung over after one of these episodes and it's disconcerting. As I've grown older and learned what to call things (thanks Tiktok I guess), I've been better able to express myself and what I go through. Even if just to myself.
Also, I find it interesting that without the usual algo's and tactics that social media en whole utilize to keep a person coming back to the platform, I am more inclined to spend time here on DW.
2:51 PM (14:51)
Mood: Okay
Interacted with some friends on Discord and beyond a heart on one of my comments, didn't receive anything more than that. I kind of prepared myself for this hiatus to increase my loneliness factor (hence posting to this journal to share my thoughts with ANYONE or just myself, I don't know) but without the constant noise of social media it feels loud. But that's okay. I posted about my goals yesterday but I really only wanted to take a break because I spend way too much of my time on social media. Also using this break to not play games on my phone is also good because of my carpal tunnel. It's already better but little steps.
I have so many projects that I want to work on but was always distracted by the socials, so that's also a reason, goal, whatever. Today I am still working on fixing the duplicate issue in Calibre as well as uploading the fanfic epubs to my gdrive.
Speaking of gdrive, I keep trying to brainstorm alternatives but they hold the market with size vs cost.
Okay, my rambling has come to a stop so I'll stop here. Maybe I'll update later. Who knows.
15:02 (3:02 PM)
Mood: Still okay
17:15 (5:15 PM)
Mood: Chill
I need to find more people to follow on DW because my reading list is DEAD. Not that that is bad, especially considering my social media tendencies. To be honest, I miss LJ days a lot. When everyone was in one place. Losing LJ was one thing (I refuse to remain on LJ due to the current owner - my LJ is still there, just never updated) and old Twitter is the same thing. It just really sucks that I find a place and it's great for a while and then I lose it. UGH. Just remembering about it. Being nostalgic now that I'm using DW as a socmed crutch. I tried using Wordpress as a blog but nothing ever competed with LJ/DW. Maybe I'll import those posts here and close that one. I still have the archive, the poetry one, and one other.
Anyway, just rambling on now at this point. lol
21:19 (9:19 PM)
Mood: